Sitting at the small table, in this corner of the enchanted city, you are the quintessential woman, from a country where smoking a Gauloise is, for a pretty woman – but you all are – never a sign of ostentation.
I love the little scarf, and the beret, matching the red schoolgirl shoes, the striped sailor’s cotton shirt, and all that cheese on the table: I smile at you but you are far away.
Were you to notice me I would be the one to lose it: the irrepressible urge to be part of your picture, but, alas, as you can see, I am escaping, crawling on the white table cloth, pretending not to be there…
Under my little shell, I blink at the red wine, promise of slow cooking, and of garlic, yes, that powerful and pungent aphrodisiac.
But, as a self-contained, if not sex-less, mollusc, I shall keep my composure, and, soiling the white cloth, keep dreaming of you.
This is quite good.
“Were you to notice me I would be the one to lose it: the irrepressible urge to be part of your picture, but, alas, as you can see, I am escaping, crawling on the white table cloth, pretending not to be there…”
Nice!
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My,my, my friend – how wonderful! And what a lucky young woman to be on the receiving side of such a reaction 😉 Only you could have written this…how can a snail make me blush?!
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OH I love this so much!!! Poor little fellow. Each line gave me a new reason to adore this piece. Excellent 😉
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That was wonderful!
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Lucky snail…
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I have to say that this is beautiful! The imagery was lovely to start with, but from the perspective of a snail… I can only imagine that magnitude of the impression grows with the shrinking of the beholder’s eyes. =)
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Very obscure good piece
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This is just a pure delight. Who would have thought to tell the story from the perspective of a smitten snail? What a wonderful imagination you have.
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Very clever. I had to read it twice and thought it extremely cute! That poor snail and who thought I’d ever say that! Well done! xxx
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How sweet! Sweetness, yet unexpected twists throughout. A lovely piece. Well done!
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Lovely! I loved the line about slow-cooking… Good luck with the escape little snail, and are those yet more intoxicated snails on her plate?
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I’ve been thinking of that darn snail’s composure since you posted this story! :))
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Loved the twist to this one…gave me a giggle!
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A great take on the prompt, and I loved the picture. The voice is perfect.
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I really enjoyed this.
In the end I felt for the lonely, love sick snail and admired his composure.
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This is fun… very crisp , great beat. Congrats, mon amie.
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I’m months late to this party – the cheese is all stale rinds, the wine has long since soured, la fille is just now showing her unfortunate pregnancy, and the escargot have gone . . .
But I love what you have done – the imagery, the PoV, the poignancy: perfection.
Great pic, too.
Cheers!
JzB
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As an afterthought, it is not only molluscs who soil white cloth in their dreams.
JzB
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