On May 7 I hope to do justice to the subject – facts and feelings about the A to Z Challenge for April – but since this is the last post (as a matter of writing?) It is tempting to finish this challenge in this way.
Of course the A to Z is a challenge, and one that boosts a writer’s creativity and zeal. In this case this has prompted me to write, at the very beginning, an alphabetically ordered (as ever a nerd) list of all the words that invoked something. Only in two or three cases did I feel later compelled to change the original choice, pushed by circumstances, or inspired by reading, some news, or a sentence heard on the street. Inspiration may come from so many strange and unexpected sources! Indeed after a week I found this exercise of late evening writing, and early morning editing, taking a momentum of its own.
But why isn’t it as easy – or at least as comfortable, if this is the word, no, “natural” is closer to it, surely? Why isn’t it as natural to work on the novel? This is the crunch: April has been the month of the challenge, but also the month when I had to admit that a rethink was overdue, after months of toil. In this way, the A to Z has depleted this writer’s zeal as well: it is in part responsible for the decision – ahhh! – to restart with somewhat new premises – fleetingly tempted to write “paradigm”, you fool… – a heartbreaking one for any writer, aspiring or confirmed.
The challenge is not to be blamed solely for that decision: comments received, sometime from people very dear to me 😦 – have contributed, as well as what I would like to think of as “aspiring writer’s fatigue”. A strange feeling that, and one I might blog about in the near future… What am I going to do now the challenge is over?